How often do you think about what you are going to say prior to actually saying it? As a counselor, I have been trained to understand that working with Native Americans, there may be a quite a long pause before my client makes a response to something we are discussing.

Native American children are taught through folklore, that they need to think carefully about the words they are going to use. The reason for this is that they believe that once statements are made, the words used will circle the globe for ever and ever, influencing the world. Perhaps all cultures should embrace this concept.

If you feel you are ready to give a "knee jerk" response", you need to take some time and reflect on what it is you want to say and how to convey your message without negativity. Count in your head to ten. This can help delay any inappropriate response you were thinking about. You may also decide to leave the room in order to calm down. No change happens overnight, but with practice and a commitment to change it happens. If more of us would take time to reflect on our words, there might be fewer heated arguments and more harmony among all of us.